AP PCS POLL, WEEK 4

AP PCS POLL

AP#1 KC BEES: ND40 has a lot to say about this but KC is the #1 team in the country for now. KC knocks off JOE and ND40 employee Serena wants to stick a tennis ball down the SOFTWARE’s throat. Software and KC are best buddies for at least a week.

AP#2 ND40: It’s September and NO ONE circles the wagons in September like ND40.

AP#3: JOE LOUIS: QB Brees get shutdown.

AP#4 MONTREAL: They quietly win football games. If it wasn’t for the JOE comeback win last week, this team is unbeaten.

AP#5 BUTTA: Winning ugly in September again. Tlic invites BUTTA to the basement for some BBQ. Butta declines.

AP#6 FLC: Kanye tells QB Romo he’s terrible.

AP#7 ROSS: RED OAK fans are asking questions now. Where are QB Brady and RB Phat Turner? Some clip-on beards have appeared at Dollar Zone. Not a lot but some.

AP#8 TLIC: TLIC is getting no love from the fantasy football gods but he does get the WB in the basement. Taco Bell wrappers everywhere and lots of B-rated comedy sit-coms. Doesn’t sound like a whole lot of fun.

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WHO’S HOT: JOE LOU (W4)
WHO’S NOT: TLIC (L4)


GAME OF THE WEEK
KC (1-1) -7 vs JOU LOU (2-0)
LAST MEETING: JOE 141, KC 93 (SUPA BOWL X)
2008 SERIES: JOE LOUIS 3-0

REMATCH OF LAST YEARS SUPA BOWL. JOE LOUIS swept this series last year. These two went at it hard last year and now in week 3 we have the GOTW. The winner will be AP PCS #1 going into week 4. Not a better early season matchup in a long long time. TMZ is reporting that the “software” was seen in West Hollywood partying hard….and we are talking drugs, too. Software went out and bought new duds, bling, went clubbin and was reportedly snortin’ with Lohan. When asked about this, Software reps said, “Software is so pumped about the TLIC victory, that he flew to Cali for the NIGHT!” KC has no comment as he was home with the wife and kids playing scrabble. These two are the modern age Odd Couple. JOE LOUIS’ comeback in week 2 was one of the greatest comebacks in Pastygangsta Football History. Weve had other incredible comebacks in league history but this one will not be soon forgotten. An incredible game between MM and JOE last week. This week KC RB Benson gets the start. The KC QB HYVEE and WR FITZ will be better than JL QB BREES. JL RB STEWART gets the nod for JL and it will be up to him to win on MNF. Folks we like KC to win here and grab AP PCS 1 going into week 4.



ND40 (1-1) -14 vs TLICIOUS (0-2)
LAST MEETING: ND40 161, TLIC 116
2008 SERIES: ND40 2-0

Usually the basement team, gets the GUT PICK but this week we feel the basement team vs AP2 deserves honorable mention. Plus, a win here by TLIC and things can turn around in a hurry. ND40 was the TEAM OF THE WEEK last week with 180plus. This team is for real. Hiring Serena has paid off for ND40. Now, she wants a piece of ownership. Not so fast S-Will. Dayna will nix that faster than Oprah can body slam Steadman. TLIC has a lot of potential in this one. This thing falls on the shoulders of QB Trent. Hes gotta throw a lot. TLIC RB HIGHTOWER needs to be very active…..like the time he arrested those hooligans in the 2nd Police Academy. Oh, the laughs. If you don’t know Hightower like we do….heres a bio.

Hightower was a florist before joining the academy. He is best known for his immense stature and inhuman strength (Hightower practices for his driving test by ripping the front seat out of a compact car (a 1977 Honda Civic owned by Copeland), and steering comfortably from the back). However, he is the most soft-spoken of all the characters. Despite his gigantic size, Hightower has sometimes admitted that he lacks self-confidence, such as when he tells Mahoney that he has not driven a car since he was twelve years old, and fears failing out of the police academy as he will not pass the driving test. His character often breaks things or uses force to threaten the bad guys. Other examples of him using his strength were when he lifted up the practice squad car with Copeland inside, who had insulted his friend Hooks by calling her a "dumb fat jiggaboo". He can also drop easily into bad-cop mode, to gain the trust of crooks he's about to arrest. However, he too graduated from the academy with a decoration for bravery, and eventually made Lieutenant after wrestling an alligator in order to save Harris' life.

How TLIC trusts this guy, well never know. Rumor has it that, TE Hooks is looking to sign a deal with TLIC if things go further south. ND40 looks really strong is emerging as a top team. The RBs of Gore and MJD are going to tough. ND40 by 2 long TDs by QB Ryan


MM (1-1) -11 vs FLC (1-1)
LAST MEETING: FLC 159, MONTREAL 126 (3RD PLACE BOWL)
LAST SEASON SERIES: MM 2-1

Poor MM. How many times can they get punked after they put out a huge offensive performance? Not even record breaker MM RB C-JOHNSON could save them. FLC toyed with ROSS last week. Now, all we are hearing about is Kanye and FLC rolling through N-VILLE in the mini-van. Listen, if you are bouncing through N-VILLE it can only be a mini-van. Kanye doesn’t mind suburbia. We just want to know how many N-ville hot moms can fit in this ride. FLC is spent all his change on RB Sproles and now inserts him as the starter. FLC WR Johnny Knox is more Joliet than N-Ville. MM QB Rivers will face FLC Eli. Give the edge to Eli. FLC QB Romo has been benched as the world is turning against him. This will be our best, closest game of the week. MM just has to win this game after last weeks craziness. MM by 11.








GUT PICK OF THE WEEK
BUTTA (1-1) -6 vs ROSS (1-1)
LAST MEETING: ROSS 151, BUTTA 130
LAST SEASON SERIES: 1-1

The loser of this game is going to have some digging to do. If TLIC wins, the loser could very well be ready to at least lease out the TLIC basement. ROSS is reeling after the poor performance last week. This team will rely on QB Brady. The ROSS WRs are as useful as a poopy-flavored lollipop. BUTTA….we mean, TEAM AP is just that. BUTTA RB AP runs the show. BUTTA QB RODGERS should finally breakout. If not, our man Cutler is waiting. BUTTA has some good matchups and with inconsistent ROSS WRS in the mix, the GUT has to go BUTTA.

AP PCS RANKINGS

AP PCS POLL

AP#1 JOE LOUIS: Unreal

AP#2 ND40: Hands BUTTA a beating and is one away from the top spot. ND40 fans have forgiven. Gets a desperate TLIC next week.

AP#3: MONTREAL: MM gets beat on a last minute catch in another incredible game between JOE and MM. MM stays in the #3 spot. Favre gets benched again and thinks he can turn TLIC around. He wants out of MONTREAL. Stay tuned.

AP#4 KC: The software and KC were at Denny’s having coffee and grand slam breakfasts while laughing it up. These two and their love-hate relationship are about to land a VH1 reality show.

AP#5 FLC: Big victory over ROSS and Kayne says, “I told you so”

AP#6 ROSS: Red Oak faithful just see this as a speed bump but they better beat BUTTA next week or people will begin to talk. And in that town that could devastating. Kayne is hated in Red Oak

AP#7 BUTTA: A big drop in confidence in the Toilet Bowl champs. TLIC invites BUTTA over to the basement to watch Mystery Science Theater 3000. Butta declines.

AP#8 TLIC: TLIC put up a valiant fight vs KC. Now, 9 losses in last 10 games. TLIC has finally gotten rid of all of ND40s trash out of the basement. Now, there are Tiffini Amber Thiessen posters everywhere. The ND40 Bed and Breakfast Basement is now officially out of biness.

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WHO’S HOT: JOE LOU, BUTTA (W3)
WHO’S NOT: TLIC (L3)


GAME OF THE WEEK
MM (1-0) -2 vs JOU LOU (1-0)
LAST MEETING: JOE 122, MONTREAL 120
2008 SERIES: 1-1

AP1 and AP3 going at it in week 2. THIS is OUR GAME OF THE WEEK. After MM QB FAVRE whined long enough MM gave in and is thus the starter in vs JOE LOU. Lets face facts folks, MM QB FAVRE will be throwing against a high school DEF this week much like the one he was working out with in Mississippi. The kicker is…will he throw a pass over 10 yards because he sure didn’t in week one. MM QB Favre will have a game that is good enough to beat JOE LOU. This week JOE LOU QB BREES will be presented with more of a challenge. He’ll still put up the numbers but not 66 points. JOE LOU WR REG will cause MM major problems. JOE LOU WR GINN JR. is a bust who is afraid to get hit. MM WR RANDY is gonna go gangsta on JOE LOU. The running games will be big in this one. MM RB JOHNSON is due for a game. JOE LOU RB BARBER and STEVEN have the potential for big numbers but they wont. We are taking MM in a slight upset. MM QB Favre will think hes cool after this one



KC (0-1) -13 vs TLICIOUS (0-1)
LAST MEETING: TLIC 127, KC 120
2008 SERIES: 1-1

This is a big game in WEEK2 already. THE loser is most likely in charge of decorating the Bed and Breakfast basement that ND40 built a few years back. This is a rematch of arguably the best SUPA BOWL we’ve ever had. TLIC RB LT is on the rack already and its week 2. FLC stole Sproles and now TLIC is scrambling. Cant wait for the FLC-TLIC matchup. KC QB HYVEE WARNER AND WR FITZ should have better games this week. KC RB Portis is another guy who will rebound. BUTTA WR favorite…… TLIC WR SMITH is going to have a hard time with a bum as a QB. Out of nowhere, TLIC picks up QB TRENT and will throw him into game action. With the absence of TLIC RB LT, RB FREDDIE will have to play above and beyond. Folks, TLIC has lost 8 out of last 9 and we feel it will be 9 out of 10. KC wins by a health serving of Vine wings……..with a 2 hour wait………but its ok because we had salads.



BUTTA (1-0) -2 vs ND40 (0-1)
LAST MEETING: BUTTA 146, ND40 92 (TOILET BOWL)
LAST SEASON SERIES: BUTTA 2-1

TOILET BOWL 2009 REMATCH. This….. always a classic matchup. ND40 is back from Paris and now the fans demand he be on the field coaching for this one. ND40 has hired Serena Williams as a consultant. ND40 tagged Serena as a “Referee Consultant” and also his “Personal Assistant………Beotch” which has Dayna suspicious. BUTTA barely wins in week 1 with a lackluster team effort except for RB AP. ND40 RB tandem of RB MJD and FRANK will be very good this week. The key for ND is whether WR TO can put up some numbers. That would put them over the top. BUTTA RB AP is apparently the whole team.. BUTTA QB Rodgers must prove his worthiness as a 3rd pick to put up some points. For BUTTA WR Calvin must be a man. This will be a close game but we expect BUTTA to go 2-0. It will be a close game with high point totals.





GUT PICK OF THE WEEK
ROSS (1-0) -7 vs FLC (0-1)
LAST MEETING: FLC 142, ROSS 108
LAST SEASON SERIES: FLC 2-0

The GUT had HYVEE CHINESE today and is feelin it. ROSS has UNCLE MO in his corner. The clip-on beards are selling $39.66 at RED OAK WALMART. Last year, we hear they were in the bargain bin at the RED OAK Dollar Store. AND as reported by buttapicks.com news sources, FLC paid Kayne West to sabotage the RED OAK town celebration after the big victory last week. Kayne took the stage as a RED OAK equipment manager took the podium. KW grabbed the mic and said, “Its was a great win for you guys but FLC is much better. Did you watch FLC last week? Later”. FLC denies this but Kayne and FLC roll in Chi-town. The GUT loves this game like Lady GaGa like she likes the pen-is. ROSS has QB BRADY and a ton of momentum. FLC has Kayne so it’s a tough call for the GUT. GUT sees ROSS going 2-0.

AP PCS POLL

AP#1 JOE LOUIS: Looks like they are picking up where they left off. Good thing BUTTA drafted QB Brees and WR Wayne

AP#2 ROSS: We are telling you. RED OAK is buzzing about this team. Off to a flying start. Not used to living away from Bed and Breakfast Basement. Kayne flying to Red Oak to stop the happiness.

AP#3 MONTREAL: Has an upset QB Favre riding the bench. MONTREAL has turned things around with a great season last year and a nice start this week.

AP#4 BUTTAFUOCO: This team is all about RB AP who single-handedly beat KC (and the software). Butta QB Cutler on thin ice.

AP#5 ND40: The world traveler comes home to a loss and fans want answers. Losing to Texas rival ROSS is a tough start. ND40 WR TO wants more action and already wants ND to be on his VH1 show “THE TO SHOW”. ND40 declined.

AP#6 FLC: Ran into JOE LOU again. Better days ahead

AP#7 KC: KC wants answers from the software. Software wont answer cell phone.

AP#8 TLIC: 8 losses in last 9 games and fans rather stay home and watch MTV VMAs. TLIC hires additional ticket reps to boost ticket sales.

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WHO’S HOT: JOE LOU, BUTTA (W2)
WHO’S NOT: MM, TLIC (L2)


GAME OF THE WEEK
ROSS (0-0) -2 vs ND40 (0-0)
LAST MEETING: ND40 115, ROSS 111 (TB Semifinals)
2008 SERIES: ND40 3-0

The battle of Texas is back……….or should I say Paris. While ND40 is frolicking in Paris there is a football game to be played. In fact, the ND40 faithful isn’t pleased with their absentee owner. ROSS on the other hand is ready for 2009. ROSS fans have a gleam in their eye. Some are sensing a dream season. The beards are out in full force…not paper bags. Last season, ND40 dominated ROSS like Chris Brown dominates Rihanna. It was just ugly. ROSS is pumped. ROSS is excited about QB Brady. He will turn him loose against ND40 QB Peyton. Peyton still remembers when ND40 traded him for a snickers bar and a ball bag to Butta. This could be a developing story all year. This matchup will down to both teams talented RBs. ND40 RB MJD and RB Gore vs ROSS studlies RB Phat Turner and RB Beverly DeAngelo. We give the edge to ROSS in a close, very fun battle. ROSS is one WR away from being a top team in the league. ND40….well…hes in Paris…..isnt that a porn?




KC (0-0) -4 vs BUTTA (0-0)
LAST MEETING: BUTTA 171, KC 164
2008 SERIES: 1-1

The TB Champion vs the SB runner-up. The software is back and has his hands on the controls. He isn’t at odds with KC yet…but this is always a developing story. BUTTA took RB AP with the first pick in the draft but is nervous about it. BUTTA starts out slow every season, so the fans aren’t expecting fireworks in week 1. The KC WRs of AJ and Fitz are nails and will give BUTTA fits. BUTTAs WRs are tossups and they need WR Gonzo to have a big game. The KC RBs (Ronnie and Phat Jacobs) are hit or miss as well. We are going with the QB Warner to WR Fitz connection. KC by 4…..





TLIC (0-0) -3 vs MM (0-0)
LAST MEETING: TLIC 141, MM 141
LAST SEASON SERIES: TLIC 1-0-1

These two teams tied last year with 141. Damn. MM was the class of the league last year but fell short in the SB playoffs. TLIC rattled off 7 losses in their last 8 games to end the season. This year Tlic loves the Bengals. QB Carson and WR Henry……still waiting for a trade to bring in WR OCHO-FVCKO. We like TLIC because MM doesn’t have their lineup set. Really dough, TLIC RB LT, TE GATES and WR Jennings are going to go gangsta all over the place. Actually, we love TLIC WR Henry this week. TLIC by trey






GUT PICK OF THE WEEK
FLC (0-0) -7 vs JOE (0-0)
LAST MEETING: JOE 166, FLC 162 (SB Semifinal)
LAST SEASON SERIES: FLC 2-1

OHHHH, the gut is still hurting from DRAFTWEEKEND. This game features two top teams from last year. They met in the SB semifinals last year and it was a classic 166-162 game. FLC won the series though. In this tilt, FLC needs RB WESTY in a big way. If FLC RB Westy can be the WESTY we know, FLC looks like a genius. JOE has QB Brees yet again. The defending champ will need him to put up 40+. The gut really likes this game. It will be a high scoring affair much like the governor and Argentina broad. A great rematch of the playoff game we saw last year. The GUT goes with FLC in another game in the 160’s by both teams.

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